Damned at 24. (I am 24 right?)


(written April 21, 2010)

Goals some 19 days before my birthday:

Calendars that belong to me usually have this particular date sliced out from their page, jumping from number ten to twelve. Celebrating my own doesn’t feel as much fun as celebrating others’. For some reason, the clock ticking has made me decide that there should be a hit list of things I should be doing or having.

I’ll try to achieve at least one of them for each day, but as of writing, I am having the infamous “writer’s block,” or in a commoner’s term, attack of laziness. Again, I’ll try, I’ll try not to shirk from achieving as my tail is already between my legs, not that I have one. I have two predominant feelings about this. First is the temptation to put in simpler goals such as folding my clothes and ironing them during weekends, or something as mundane a task as brushing my teeth before sleeping. Second is not to succumb to defeat even before finishing my list of things to do.

I know I may not be able to achieve all, being a realist, but the optimist in me refrains from entertaining this. I’ll happily put a check mark on each soon as I accomplish them – stress on the word “happily.”

Goal number 1. Paint my nails – including cleaning them up first. I’d like to buy that glittery brown/orange (I honestly am poor with color differentiation) one to replace my chipped peach-colored nails. I wanted a black one, but that hardly seems ideal for someone celebrating birth. And yes, all the works, cleaning and stuff.

Goal number 2. Buy ballet shoes – clash of the non-sensical and worldly desires. I recently bought two-(or was it three?) inches heels and though I have learned how to run after a bus in them, I am still sticking to my all-time favorite flats. Killer shoes are only for killer days, and killer feet at the end of it. Do add a matching bag for it. My current ones are screaming for retirement

Goal number 3. Buy a cute dress. And yes, I am gay. Haha.

Goal number 4. Get blue hair color highlights. A bit tired of the jet black, and a feeling that neon green or pink would be over over doing it, I decided to settle on a cool yet, uhm, cool shade of blue. That is if the hair stylist at the parlor decides that I can already do experiments with my hair.

Goal number 5. Buy new bed sheets. Tired of the old and shabby looking bedsheets? Then it’s time to replace them! Although the ones I originally bought back from home are a bit expensive (but old, since I have had them when I still had only two front teeth), it would do wonders to my sleep (and eyebags) to try new, comfy, soft and hopefully inexpensive, ones.

Mental note to self: I am feeling positive about Goals 2-5 in achieving them all in one day – Pay day that is! Okay four down.

Goal number 6. Get a balikbayan box, fill it up with nice, inexpensive, expensive, edible, and usable things to send home. I love giving presents, but won’t be too surprised if I don’t have money for tomorrow haha. This will probably be completed on Pay day as well. Dang, payday. A few more days.

Goal number 7. Fulfill goal number 6. This goal makes it easier for me to complete my checklist, and also serves as a reminder that I should, I should, I should!

Goal number 8. Get another job and get the pass approved. This is the most difficult and the most prayed off all. I do not wish to expect, after all, que sera sera. But I do hope I find a real one, for at least the sake of my sanity. Please.

Goal number 9. Stuff this more with meaningful goals. I admit I am lazy writing now, and will get into writing again tomorrow. Just have to put all efforts to achieve, well, at least the first one. That’s a start right?

Goal number 10. Decide if I am going to spend this dreaded deadline in Malaysia or not. Two things: one, is the tremendous difficulty in filing for a leave with this god-forsaken company and two, is if I would be able to give in to this luxury, let alone save enough, for the trip. I’ll probably be allotting all the money with remittance and package costs, but then again I don’t like my own birthday parties.

Mental note to self 2: Rush to any store still selling nail polishes since I will be going home at 9pm. Hmmm.
P. S. Please be diligent enough to finish this list. Haha.

And oh…

Goal number 11. Try to fix the layout of this blog. It looks horrendous. Please have consideration for other readers, namely, me. Aja!

I used to think way back that mid 20s are old – really old old. I never envisioned myself being like ’em corporate types lugging briefcases, wearing long sleeves and having difficulty walking on tight tight skirts on super duper high heels. But here I am, just a few more winks to 24, and it’s not so bad after all. 🙂


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